cheers to a healthy year.

While my New Year's resolutions were not related to fitness/healthy eating this year (the marathon is more of a mental goal for me than anything else) I have been making strides toward eating healthier.

I shared here my views about food and history with it.  In short - I've always been a gym rat, never been an over-eater...but I definitely have not been a healthy eating nut.  The eating adjustments I've made in the past and shared on the blog (giving up gluten recently for a few months, for example, and several years being "fish only" prior to having kids) were to primarily lose a few pounds or to simply "try out"...not make a permanent dietary change.

The fact is that now I am (gasp!) getting older.  Not only is eating crap not good for me, but my body is literally rejecting my occasional unhealthy ways.  I find myself more tired, and even if it is only a few pounds, I certainly gain them easier and it is more work to burn off.

So, alas, after Thanksgiving I boarded healthy eating/clean eating/whatever-you-want-to call it "train."  This adventure both excites and dismays me.  Excites me because I love a challenge and enjoy the idea of creating super healthy meals.  Dismays me because it forces me to feel a little guilty about all the crap I've consumed in the past.

To begin with : drinking alcohol.  Gone are the days of getting hammered on a Friday night, passing out eating White Castle cheeseburgers (blech!) and then spending the next day comatose on the couch, emerging into daylight only to drive to get a Chipotle burrito, inhale it, and then pass out again.  Uh, not that I ever did that...at least I haven't since having kids.

Now, as a mama of two toddlers, if I choose to get tipsy on red wine with my hubby or the occasional girl's night, I know I will suffer the next day.  That knowledge, in itself, is kind of a buzz-kill.  I mean, you can't veg all day on the couch when you have two toddlers to entertain and care for.  So at the end of a night out I am usually chugging down water and a handful of Advil and praying both kids sleep until at least 7am.  

Therefore, I rarely drink more than a glass of wine.  Happily, this cuts back on lots of calories (and hangovers.) 

Next : junk food/over-doing the carbs.   I fear my days of fast food enjoyment and eating half a pizza are over.  My metabolism is no longer down with that.  My digestive system has never been down with that.  I used to roll my eyes at girls eating salads and carefully dividing up their food into two normal portions at restaurants, saving one for later.  Now I still inwardly roll my eyes...but then I do it, too! 

I've become kind of obsessed with green smoothies, and have begun replacing 1-2 meals a day during the week with them.  Also, weeknight meals are in the process of becoming healthier/cleaner.  Gone are the heavy pastas and savory roasts and loads of carbs.  I've decided to do bigger, heavier Sunday night dinners, but keeping weeknights light.

Every day I try to trick myself into drinking more water.  I throw in lemon juice, lemon slices, frozen berries, cucumber, mint, etc.  I drink out of cute little Mason jars, or fancy water glasses.  Anything.  I find it easy to chug water on a long run or at the gym, but hard to remember during my normal daytime routine.  But I am trying!

I have begun ordering hot herbal tea instead of lattes when I am at coffee shops.  I am by no means swearing off coffee but have cut back substantially after doing a 3-day cleanse recently (I'll post about that soon!)

So I guess it is about little changes.  For me and for my whole family.  Adding that glass of lemon water first thing in the morning.  Always having some brown rice in the fridge ready to heat up and add some veggies/protein to if I am having a "carb craving." Buying new (for me) proteins that are both filling and healthful and adding them to meals (edamame and tofu, for example.)

Thankfully Fin seems to love my green smoothies and Cormac declares he loves kale and carrots.  So there is some progress. :)  I like the quote below for motivation.  You definitely have to have the right attitude about clean eating to effectively make the changes in your life...

//source//

I know I have a long way to go, but since beginning to make these small changes in my diet I feel better in a lot of ways.  Better digestion, better sleep, better energy, better mental health, fewer junk food cravings...it all is affected.   Kind of incredible the difference clean eating makes!

What changes are you making in your diet in the New Year to improve your body/life?  I welcome any tips you use to eat better/cleaner in the comments section!  It is definitely a work in progress for me!  

stitch fix : new year's fix!

A New Year -- a new Fix!

If you know me, you know I love Stitch Fix, an online personal styling service that costs you only $20 per use -- which gets applied to any item you decide to keep.  It is really fun if you like getting a "surprise" shipment of hand-picked for you items in the mail, trying them on in the comfort of your own home with all your own other clothing and accessories, and just using the provided mailer to easily ship back whatever you don't love.  You give them all your personal style info, measurements, price range, and even link them to any Pinterest fashion board you might have...then they send you your Fix whenever you schedule it.  That is the service in a nutshell -- click HERE for more details and to get your own Fix!

My requests this time around were pretty specific : a peasant blouse with embroidered detail, a bright scarf, a lighter-weight, non-furry, green field jacket, something involving neon yellow (sweater, blouse, scarf - didn't matter) and a buffalo-plaid shirt or vest.  Again, no pants, dresses or accessories besides the scarf.

So here we go with the goods...

#1. Hildie Layered Knit Top (by State Side)

This white shirt is completely my style. 100%.  Slouchy, the layered look, neutral.  LOVE!  Sorry, but I had to bring out my aviators even though, no, it was not sunny.  (Actually, it was windy and slightly rainy - doh!)  But this is how I picture this shirt -- carrying into the spring and being something I can wear even in summer on cool days with shorts.  It is so soft and lightweight.  The price point is a bit high for what I feel it should be...but after scouring my favorite stores/websites all weekend for something similar, but cheaper, that I thought would be just as soft/comfy/flattering, but to no avail -- I decided it is a KEEP!  I will simply wear it every day just to make up for the splurge. ;)

#2. Redhouse Striped Hooded Sweatshirt

My expression in the second photo shows my disappointment with this top.   Even though I like a comfy style, I thought this was WAY overpriced for what it is.  I do love stripes, but I did not like the pocket on the front in any way.  I mean, I am not trying to accentuate my bit of "perma-baby belly," thank you very much.  Plus, I think this would be cute if I was 73, not 33.  You know, one of those cute little grandmas who is really active???  Down in Florida, power-walking in her cute little lightweight sweatshirt at 6am?  Okay, so sending back.

#3 Winifred Removable Fur Hood Anorak Jacket (by Ark and Co.)

Does this coat look familiar?  My last Fix contained a very similar one.  The differences are : this one is lighter-weight, a bit more form-fitting, less expensive, and has a removable fur trim for the hood (clearly I removed it for these pics.)  These factors make me really, really like it.  It is also more of a raincoat on the outside, rather than a super-soft and fluffy parka...which I feel can transition into spring.  The lining is a satin leopard print, too -- really cute!  Keep!  (I've worn it every day since getting it.  Literally living in this coat now.)

#4 Sandra Abstract Print Infinity Scarf (by Octavia) 

This scarf was bright and colorful, as I requested -- and sooooo soft!  Like a flannel blanket! Hubby thought it was cute, and I liked it fine;  however, I just wasn't struck by it.  I guess I have just gotten really picky when it comes to scarves, so I am going to abandon my scarf request for now.   I am having trouble articulating my vision.  Or I don't know what my vision is.  Maybe next fall?  Sending this one back.

#5 Torrey Henley Button Top

Well, this was not the "buffalo plaid" I was envisioning...as I thought it would be an actual flannel shirt.  But, to be fair, I didn't really specify that it should be.  This was more of a linen, and interestingly had no collar.  The tab-style, 3/4 sleeves were interesting.  I actually liked it and debated keeping it!  I played around with different looks and it is pretty versatile!  A little boxy, but a belt and/or sweater helped with that.   In the end I decided to send it back because it is simply not the style I am going for.  I would have preferred a more classic, collared, flannel rugged plaid shirt (ooh, maybe with leather elbow patches!?)  But again, probably too late in the season for all that.  Sent back!

Even though there was no sign of any neon, or what I was envisioning as a peasant blouse, I was pretty pleased with my Fix because of the two items I loved!  My stylist really nailed my style with that white shirt, and I am thrilled to finally have my army green jacket!  The rest weren't too far off. 

I am still dreaming of the elusive "Keep All" Fix!

Anyone else had one???  Anyone else in love with Stitch Fix?  I get nothing from Stitch Fix for writing about my experiences, but if you were inspired by this post at all, use me as your referral by clicking here and signing up!  I get a $25 credit if you do, and if you refer anyone and they get a Fix you get that same incentive! :)  I have several sweet friends who used me as their referral and it really made my day!!!

Well, that is it for fashion until my next Fix!  

Today I am back to my normal mama routine,  and will probably be putting away Christmas decorations until spring rolls around.  Had an awesome holiday season, but am actually ready for some structure and normality around the house.  Anyone else feel me?  Am I weird for being a bit burnt out on "fun"?  

Hope everyone going back to work today survives the first day back!  

//2015 resolutions -- less is more//

It's one of those days you take stock.  You feel revived (or hung over.)  You have big dreams for a new year.

Last night I stayed up until midnight for the first time in several years -- probably since having kids. No, we didn't go out and party.  We ordered takeout sushi rolls and shrimp fried rice, I drank a Red Bull (in order to stay up) and we watched a movie.  I knew it had struck the magical hour of midnight not because of a countdown or someone trying to kiss me or confetti flying through the air, but because I heard fireworks outside our home which prompted me to check the time.  12:01.

The proverbial ball had dropped in our city -- it was 2015!  And we were snuggled on the couch watching Wolf of Wall Street on NetFlix.

So it's not glamorous -- but it is our life currently, and it is kind of a lovely one, in my book.

Hubby and I have had flashy, exciting New Year's celebrations before.  Going out with friends and dressing to the nines.  I am sure we will again!  But during these days of babies and toddlers and lack of sleep, it is jammies and takeout and a movie.

Now it is 6:30 in the morning and time for me to make the resolutions 'blog official.' Somehow it always helps to write things out - in a journal, blog, or scrap of paper you hang on your fridge.

I have quite a few resolutions and personal things I really want to work on this year.  I am sure we all do, right?  But if pressed for concrete goals, here are my two:

1) Run my first marathon.  I am up to the 14 mile point in my training and I am loving my long runs.   I am excited to complete this goal I have had in my mind for such a long time!
2) Learn to sew.  Okay, so not only did I not start cooking until I got married at age twenty-six, but I really had not acquired any of the life skills that most of our grandmothers and great-grandmothers all were required to know.  Honestly, I am not even sure I could efficiently hand sew a button. If you had a mother or grandma that taught you these things, consider that a blessing!  We went through a period in time where these skills seemed to become obsolete and only in recent years (thank you Etsy and Pinterest!) that knowing how to DIY has once again become a useful, desired, and marketable skill. I am excited in the nerdiest of ways to learn to use my new sewing machine.   I already have a list of things I want to make, and I am hopeful I become proficient enough in the coming years to be able to teach Cormac and Finola a thing or two when they are old enough.

So that is it -- two major things to accomplish.  Doesn't seem like much.  I think that naturally I will accomplish more than this, but I don't want to stress myself out complicating things.  I like this as my mantra for the year...

//source//

+ + + + + +

What are your goals/resolutions for 2015?  

mama confessions : holding hands.

I remember the distinct thrill of first intimacy when a guy would reach for my hand for the first time on a date.  The way his thumb might rub the top of my hand while walking, or draw pictures on my palm during a movie.  Even better than a first kiss, sometimes, was the first time holding hands.

Or there were the times sitting in church with my Gram, when she would grab my hand and hold it throughout a hymn while we sang, and I would be struck by how close to her that touch made me feel.  I would marvel at the coolness of her skin, papery yet soft as silk. The wrinkles and pale blue, raised up veins on the tops made me think somehow of her life and all she had been through for her hands to have gotten to this point.  Her life had not been an easy one, but yet there she was, at peace, holding hands with me.

I never was first to let Gram's hand go.  I practically held my breath until she did.

Then there is holding hands with my husband.  No longer the thrill of the unknown, but the peace that comes from the known.  Even better.  The steady and always firm comfort.  They seem to embody who he is.  Never clammy, slightly on the dry side. Always warm and strong and capable.

Now I will confess that my current favorite person to hold hands with is my son.  Three years old.  If you are a mama of one this age you may know exactly what I am talking about.  Not just the hand held out for you to grab before crossing the street or a parking lot - the necessary hand holds.  No, even sweeter still are the moments he grabs my hand while snuggling on the couch.  Or when I am laying in his bed holding him at nap time, hoping to God he will fall asleep soon so I can sneak out and get things checked off my to-do list, and then he grabs my hand.  He'll squeeze it lightly, or rub his tiny thumb on my palm in perfect contentment until he drifts off to sleep.

When he reaches for my hand in those moments, it is like I am on a first date again, sorta.  I am overcome by the intimacy.  In those moments my to-do list flies from my mind and I am only wondering how long I can lay there just enjoying holding hands before I fall asleep myself.

We delve out hugs (well, if you are a hugger like I am) left and right, to relatives, friends, maybe even co-workers at times.  A hug is great - it is sweet, commonplace, socially acceptable affection.

But grabbing someones hand, to me, is intimacy at its core.  You can't do it without wanting a serious connection. The intertwining of fingers.  Whether with a lover, a close relative, a dear friend, or, in my opinion, quite possibly the best hand holding -- with your child, who needs your warmth and trust and comfort and closeness.

And to be truthful, most days you need theirs just as much.

the renovation : the dining room

It has been a long time since I've posted on the 'dream home' renovation progress.  Not that there hasn't been any...just nothing all that noticeable.

But since Thanksgiving is this week and we hopefully are all feasting somewhere, I thought I would share our dining room progress!

This room, when we purchased our home, was the living room for the back unit (then a two bedroom rental.)  Someone had the brilliant idea of painting one of the walls and all the built-in bookshelves black.  There was really icky, old carpet, a very outdated (not in a good way) light fixture, and the white on the trim and ceiling was pretty dingy.

So we changed all of that!  :)

Here you can see the door that was once separating the front of the home from the back...which we have opened up!  

You can tell I love warm colors! The large canvas art I bought when I first moved to Cincinnati and also hung in the dining room of our first home.  The dining table and rust-hued chairs we purchased when we got married seven years ago.  Both the art and the table still make me happy!   I am getting ready to host Thanksgiving dinner next week, so I've decked out the table with a few things.   I love the afternoon sunlight in this room so we haven't put any window coverings up.  Do you think it is necessary?   I kind of want to keep them bare, which is probably a design no-no.  (Sound off in the comment section below!) 


Here is the before view, looking in from the bottom of the back staircase.  While the back of the house has less Victorian architectural detail, the built-ins and this arch are two things that made me happy when we first looked at the house.

The wall color we used is Sherwin Williams "Dorian Gray" which is a warm medium gray.   The light fixture we custom ordered from Etsy.

Isn't it amazing what paint and decor (and sunlight) can do for a room?

We also added a doorway in that corner leading down to our basement.  Prior to that if I wanted anything out of storage (which, let's face it, we have a ton down there due to the renovation) I had to walk outside, around the house, and unlock a separate exterior door.  Yuck.  So I am very glad we added this door for inner, convenient access!

While I actually love a black accent wall...the lovely built-in shelves got lost with this choice.  So we painted them white and did away with the black:

Beyond the stairwell / hallway you can see the family room, which we are still working on, but you can see our progress from this post.

Now we are trying to decide on hallway colors, as you can see.  

(There are quite a few walls in our home with paint samples galore!)

I hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday!

finola - 18 months!

              

Dear Finola, 

On Thursday you turned eighteen months.

I have struggled to write this post because everyone (including you) has been sick this week and it has been a blur of night wakings and coughing and rubbing Vick's on chests.  But I know if I don't get this down it will only get harder and harder to do.

So here goes...

Since your first birthday you have quickly leapt from crawling baby with a few little curls behind her ears  to walking, running, dancing, "hopping" crazy little girl with wildly bouncing blonde mane who has a daily increasing vocabulary.

You have quite a few more words than your brother did at this point, which has been super fun!  You say words like "bummer" "hop-hop" "juice" "up" "done" "dog" and are awesome at repeating things.

I still consider you a fairly "easy" baby (which, of course, is all relative.  My "hard" might be another person's "easy" or vice versa) but you have started to have some "pre-terrible twos meltdowns."  Girl, your meltdowns are a considerably more dramatic than your brother's ever were.  If you are told "no" (even in a quiet and patient tone) you shriek in the highest pitch I've ever heard,  crumble to the floor in a "child's pose" (we speak in yoga often in our house) and many times will try to bang your little blonde head into the floor (which I gently prevent while rubbing your back.)  You have also hit me in the face and pulled my hair when mad...which I am not a huge fan of.  

You do funny things like sit on Cormac's toilet (clothed) and yell "POT!" and then go through the motions of brother's bathroom routine.  I have to prevent you from flushing the toilet a million times.  Does this mean you will potty train early?  Boy, wouldn't that be lovely!

You are still a really, really good eater, favoring fruit over any other food.  You are in the 30th percentile for height, and 80th for weight.  The doc said at some point soon you will become a pickier eater and have a growth spurt...so I am going to enjoy your chunk while I can.

please nola, always eat your cake with gusto!!!

Still a great sleeper.  So, so, so easy to put down for naps and bedtime.  Now you like to have a pillow and be tucked in with your blankie like a big girl.   You always ends up back on your tummy though, per usual, sprawled out and breathing noisily.   You sleep just like your Dada...while Cormac sleeps peacefully on his back, completely silent, like Mama.

You started walking just before turning 14 months old.  You are now my little dancer who twirls and moves happily to any music you like. There are even songs I will sing that you will hum and bob your head and try to sing along with.

You fold your hands to pray at mealtime prayers, and even say some of the words...which melts me, of course. 

You love to help me do all kinds of chores, especially cooking.  I am praying this continues and you and your brother will spend a lot of time with me in the kitchen, honing our skills.  I didn't start cooking until I was twenty-six years old and married,  so you will have an awesome head start, I hope!

mama's helper always!

You cling to me most times when upset, but your adore your Dada and whenever you hear my phone ring or the door open you yell, "Dada, dada, dada!" excitedly and run for the door.    You are pretty affectionate with people you know.  I am dreading your teenage years because you have a sweet, flirty smile and sparkle in your eyes that will capture any heart.

Of course, you also have a deadpan stare (and strong arm) that could deter any unwanted affections...so perhaps we are safe?

just started walking - still tentative!

loooooves to swing!

with great grandpa - she's a total cuddler 

sometimes a wide stance is necessary.

snuggles from her pop-pop

jumping on beds and wrestling with her brother are a couple of her favorite activities.

I promise she usually wears pants.

swingin' with grampa

getting dirty does not bother her.

mostly a mama's girl...but definitely loves her some dada, too!

that smile is how I'll always remember her at this age

piggy face.

"Hold hands with you?  Not so sure about that..."

white tights never a great idea with this one.  does not fit our lifestyle.

  I think perhaps you might have inherited my unintentionally expressive face.  You can't really hide your emotions.  The flip side of that is your joy and laughter is loud and boisterous and infectious.  Your serious, perplexed stare is kind of fun, too.  I relate to it well...

annoyed...probably due to the forced family photos.

"Fine mom. I'll wear this flower costume.  But I won't like it."

CANDY!!!!

probably a sugar meltdown.  just sayin'.

my little poofy snow angel

you can't see it but she is carrying a walking stick.  a future outdoorswoman, I'm sure!

While I'm sad I never got to have the same one-on-one relationship I had with your brother at this age, I am overjoyed to get to watch you together.  There is fighting, there is irritation, there is laughter, there is love...

I love the two of you together, despite the chaos that always ensues.  However, I savor the "stolen" moments alone with you, as well.  Like while Cormac is at pre-school for a couple hours several days a week, or when you first wake up from your nap and I let brother watch a show just so we can hang out a little bit.

so we both look a little frazzled here -- but this is our mama/daughter reality.  

I pray for you every day and that I can always be the mother that you need - better than my natural abilities allow.

I love you, little girl!

Mama