halloween with the blondies.

This Halloween I learned some very important things about my children...

1) Cormac is obsessed with this holiday and loves all things "creepy."  Meanwhile, Finola is petrified of any spooky things in real life, especially people dressed as monsters and giant spiders.

2) Finola hates chocolate.  She took bites out of every piece of her Halloween candy that was chocolate and promptly spit each bite out, shouting "Don't like it!"

3) Cormac's favorite candy is Reese's cups.  Which is good because it (sort of) prevents me from eating them.

4) Both children are completely enamored with Tim Burton's The Nightmare Before Christmas.  I believe they have watched (at least the beginning of) it at least every day for the past month.  When I asked them today what their favorite Christmas song is they both said, "The ones on Nightmare Before Christmas."  Uhhhh....

It was a memorable Halloween season.  Most fun yet!  We did as many Halloween-y things as we could fit in.  And then, I let a few things go, so as not to feel overwhelmed.  Since I'm not a naturally laid-back, go-with-the-flow mama, but more of a high-energy nutcase who tries to "do it all," I have to keep myself in check a lot, especially during the holiday season.

Any other mamas find that it is a delicate balance between doing as much as you can for your kids, and yet not doing too much so that you go insane?  

Things I let go of this year...

Going to additional trick-or-treating/trunk or treat events.  Roasting the pumpkin seeds from our pumpkins.  (I almost convinced myself to try make a pumpkin pie from their innards!  Then I checked myself, and said, "Nope!")    Doing Cormac's makeup.  (Hubby did it while I wrung my hands in the background.)  Trying to find creative costumes at thrift stores or make them myself. (Kroger for the win!)

How do you plan to keep yourself balanced and mentally happy during the upcoming holiday season?

why I tried advocare : 24 day challenge recap

*The following post is in not sponsored by Advocare.  While I would love free Spark, I do not get compensated for posting about the program.  This is completely my own opinion and experience.

Clean eating is a term you pretty much can't go a day without hearing these days.  You are either one of those people who rolls their eyes at "clean eaters" and says, "I WILL enjoy this Oreo, dang you!"  or you think, "Hmmmm...that sounds really awesome...and impossible."

I have done a little of both.  Don't be fooled : people tend to "poo poo" things that they don't believe they can do...and secretly they wish they could.  (Nay-sayers should be your biggest motivators!!!!)

I wanted to be a clean eater, but I had spent my entire life eating a different way : basically whatever I wanted, in moderation, with occasional sugar or carb or cheese or alcohol binges, that made me feel like CRAP both mentally and physically.  I justified it by telling myself that I exercise enough to do that every once in a while.  No big deal.  Same with grabbing 3 (or 10) Oreos when I buy them on occasion.  Or feeling PMS-y and making a giant vat of spaghetti, burying myself into the couch and watching rom-coms.

But all these little innocent food habits that were "no big deal" had gotten me into a little rut.

Sure, I am a very active person who works out nearly every day.  BUT - things are different now than in my twenties.  I have had two babies, and am 34-years-old with a gradually slowing metabolism.  I can tell, especially after having Finola right before I turned 32 that things are not what they used to be.  The number on the scale, sure.  But the rest, too  It will never be the same.  But - it can still be good.  My body can be better, and stronger, in different ways.

Last year I started doing food challenges on a regular basis.  One month dairy-free, another gluten free, another sugar free, etc.  I chronicled some on this very blog.

I ran a marathon.

I tried green smoothie cleanses.  (Which usually left me hungry by 2pm and guiltily binging on something that definitely was not a smoothie.)

I began to feel like nothing was producing any real change.

So while not overweight, I wasn't feeling healthy.  In fact, I felt a little bummed and out of control.  Why did I still have a bit of a baby belly?  Why was I working out so hard and my body seemed stuck, despite all my eating + physical challenges?

I had hit the dreaded plateau, as they say.

Then I started logging my eating and counting calories.  Wow!  Very enlightening.  I immediately saw that while I could eat reasonably healthy all day (thus making me think I was a healthy eater) at night when my husband came home and the kiddos were in bed I (we) would eat a bunch of crap. Microwave popcorn.  Alcohol.  Chips.  Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.  Ice cream.  Ice cream.  Ice cream.

It wasn't good.  For either of us.  Especially my Hubby, who works long hours at a desk job, and does not normally get many chances to work out.

But it was a habit we had always had, even before kids.   It was comfortable.  We both looked forward to it.

How could we enjoy watching our shows without also eating a bunch of junk food????

It sounds silly, but I'm serious as a heart attack.  (Kinda like the one that Hubby, due to genetics and our crappy eating habits, is at risk for.  Yikes.)

Our inner eating mantras were completely out-of-whack.

I think this is something that happens in many areas of life -- not just our eating habits.  We get used to something and settle for something not healthy.  We think we need it.  We think life won't be as good without it.  Somehow we will be missing something if we get rid of it.  Friendships.  Dating relationships.  Possessions.

But, chances are, if you have a sneaking suspicion that it is making you unhappy, you WILL be happier without it.

So, I knew in my head the late-night binge sessions were counterproductive to my health goals.  I knew I needed to change.  Develop new habits.  Go to bed earlier.  Stop eating after 7pm, even if it meant eating a bigger dinner.

Stop settling for less than I deserved - meaning, a healthy, happy life!

So I was hoping for something to inspire such a change.  Obviously my nagging and complaining to Hubby about it wasn't working.  We kept on with the nightly routine.

THEN - something came up that I had rolled my eyes at in the past.   A couple joined our church community group who had both lost considerable weight/inches through using Advocare.  They had done the 24-Day Challenge.  Then our group leaders did the Challenge and also had amazing results.

For those unfamiliar with the Advocare challenge, you basically purchase their supplements and follow a clean eating diet while using the plan provided.  The first ten days are the "cleanse phase" in which you take probiotic, fiber and herbal cleanse supplements along with omega-3's.  Days eleven through twenty four is the "max phase" in which you take a whole different set of supplements, and continue your clean eating.   The products do help you curb your appetite and give you energy - both kind of awesome and really helpful in getting you to make better eating choices and stay active/focused.

So Hubby and I went to the informational meeting and decided to try it.  I kept saying, "Yeah, we are going to do this together, but I'm just trying to be supportive for Paul, since he wants to lose weight."  Which was true, BUT also I was hopeful for a way to kick my bad eating habits.  And yes, lose those last few pounds of stubborn baby weight.  I felt I had to say those things.  I down-played my own desire to be healthy because I was afraid of being judged, considering I was not overweight.

(Just because someone is a healthy weight does not mean they are being as healthy as they can be!)

Five days into the 24 Day Challenge I could not even believe how much better I felt.   I no longer felt the bloated feeling I always had before.  I quickly dropped the few pounds I wanted to lose.  Best of all, I felt empowered by the healthy choices I was making.

And I still got to eat!  I love food, so that was kinda key.  I had to get creative finding ways to enjoy veggies (not my favorite food group) and completely cutting out cheese and most breads was definitely a challenge.  I allowed myself 2 servings of whole wheat grains per day, and even had a burger night (lean organic beef topped with guacamole and wrapped in a romaine leaf...but still - a burger!)

It was not just a challenge - it was training for the kind of life I wanted to lead.

I no longer took "innocent" bites of my kiddos mac n cheese, or grabbed a cookie here and there.  I felt strong reaching for the raw veggies and hummus, as opposed to my normal snack of wheat thins and cheese slices.

I carried my water around like a trophy - finally able to drink the recommended amount.

And now, post-Challenge, I am happy to report both Hubby and I are still eating clean.  And excited to continue to do so!

Our results?

I lost five pounds during the first ten days (the cleanse phase) and have consistently kept it off.  I have no before/after pics of myself, but more than the number on the scale, I feel just better/lighter/healthier overall, and more in control of my eating habits.  Without feeling hangry...which is pretty big for me.

Hubby lost fifteen pounds!  Woo hoo!  I was amazed by how strong his will-power was during his challenge, and by the good choices he continues to make.  He lost the pounds and inches (we didn't actually measure ourselves, but his photos below show his progress!) without increasing his physical activity at all.  Just cutting out processed foods, kicking his Coke Zero habit (4-6 a day!) and making healthy swaps he made huge progress in only 24 days.

Here are Hubby's before/after shots (which he was totally cool with me posting, btw!) :

SO proud of him!  Hubby is continuing to use Advocare products to strive for his ultimate weight loss goal.  And I am sure I will do another challenge after the 90-day waiting period.

My only advice is this : If you aren't happy with your body/health - do something different!  And if that doesn't work, try something else - whether it is a cleanse, training for a race, or simply committing to going to the gym a couple times a week. And, even if you hate exercise - eat clean.  No matter what your weight...try to cut the processed food out of your diet. At least make baby steps.  Cut out soda.  Swap white rice for brown.  Learn to drink your coffee black.  I speak from experience, you can train your taste buds to enjoy it this way. And once you stop eating the crap, the funny thing is that it doesn't even taste great when you do eat it.  All of a sudden you crave the good stuff instead.  Also, for me personally, my skin is better (no breakouts, even when PMSing!)

I wish I would have changed my eating habits YEARS ago.

Know yourself - and be realistic.  If you cannot have sweets in your house without over-eating them, don't have them in your house.  For me, I just can't buy cheese anymore, unless it is a bit of feta or goat cheese to put on salads.  Cheese is just something I had to pretty much eliminate or else, truly, it is a slippery slope for me.

Besides continuing to develop clean eating habits, in the month of November I am challenging myself in another way: 30 Days of Group Exercise! I have decided to branch out and try as many different classes this month as I can.  Typically I only do a weekly spin and yoga class, but there are some classes I have either avoided due to to thinking I will hate them, or desired to do for years but just never pulled the trigger.

I can and I will.

This week's schedule : Hot Yoga, Zumba, Spinning, Barre3, Yoga, Boot Camp Conditioning, and Body Works Plus Abs

Pretty excited!

Does anyone have any classes they LOVE and think I should try?  Let me know!

Happy Monday, everyone!  

mama confessions : what I am and what I'm not.

Yesterday was the last game of Cormac's soccer season.  

Let me sum up for you how each of his games went :  I would try to get him excited all day about it. He would seem excited!  We would get there.  He would cry and yell adamantly that he did NOT want to play soccer and soccer was the worst thing in the world!!!!  I would try to calm him down so as to not alarm the other soccer moms.  I would tell him he needed to at least sit with his team and watch, if not play.  He would finally calm down, after taking my hand and using it to roughly wipe his tears and boogs (basically a 'hand hankie.')  He would amble over to his team, already warming up for the game, and the coaches would be overly nice and encouraging to him.  He would participate eventually (aka run up and down the field, sometimes yelling "Hey Mom!" and smiling and waving at me, completely oblivious to where the ball was.)

The game ended yesterday, and I was just thankful he ended up trying, considering his epic meltdown.  He got a participation medal (which he promptly gave to Finola, the loudest cheerleader at the game.) He ate pizza with his team, sweetly thanked the coaches and said goodbye to his little friends.  Then we all went on a nature hike on the park trail I promised him -- his sole motivation for participating in the soccer game.

So my kid is probably not a soccer player.  And I am not a soccer mom.

Team sports, in general, give me anxiety.  I was the kid who was afraid of the ball, afraid of making a mistake, and completely uncoordinated.  I was required to play volleyball (disaster) basketball (nooo!) and softball (ew) in grade school and I was the one they stuck in the least obtrusive position and then made sure there was someone nearby to cover for me.  I also dislike crowds and people yelling things at me.  This is why I run, people!

I never tried soccer, but my guess is I would have been terrible.

Now, maybe Cormac will find a team sport he likes.  Maybe he will someday end up liking soccer, even.  He is only four, after all.  Or maybe he will be a runner, hiker, introverted adventurer like his mama.

That would be just fine, too.  :)

I totally understand this face. :D

renovation diary : the powder room

If you have been reading this tiny blog in the past few years you know that in 2012 we took on a huge renovation project of a Victorian home built in 1859.

I call it the 'dream home' because I spent two years running by this house in our neighborhood thinking how much I liked it, dreaming that the price would dip to where we could afford it.

After a total of five years on the market, it finally got down to where we could justify the purchase + cost of renovation...and it became ours!

Wow, that seems like forever ago.

This will probably be the renovation that never ends, but I suppose we have plenty of time. :)

Now, time for a little update, since I haven't done that in a while.  Lots has been happening, progress being made, but nothing 100% completed.   So I've delayed in posting anything.  BUT, I don't really know if any space in this home will ever be 100%, so I may as well share the little things we've done so far.

Starting with the powder room!

Here is our entryway when we first bought the house, as you come in the front door.  As you can see there was a half bath straight ahead (with Paul and baby Mac checking it out!) 

The wall with the sink and mirror contained electric and plumbing, and also blocked the doorway to the back half of our home (which, since it's original build in 1859, had been converted to a two-family, the front and back divided into two two-story units.)

So, to convert it back to a single family home, we opened up that wall, moved the plumbing and electric, and created a hallway/door to the back half of the house.  Half of the previous half bath morphed into our current, tiny powder room.

Here are some photos of the transformation...

The entry has come a long way -- but we still need to paint the walls, as well as the backs of the steps and spindles/ballister (or whatever that big piece at the bottom is called.)

The photo below is looking through the hallway, bathroom on left, dining room straight ahead.  The dining room has pretty much been a "work zone" housing all Hubby's tools for the past year.  The floor is forever dusty.  It literally drives me insane and causes me to shriek, "I am done with this renovation - contract the rest out!" at my poor husband at least once a week.

Hubby had to use leftover trim and also re-create the look of our trim using new wood in this tiny hallway, which has three doorways requiring trim.

The tile work in progress.

Before the trim was painted, and after.  Brightens things up, right?  Now to decide on a wall color!
And do you like how our dog Colbie manages to be in every photo?

            

I really wanted a somewhat glam look to this bathroom - something black and white and bold.  So we went from almost choosing greige subway tile to a black with bright white grout.  I had also been wanting to try black paint on wall somewhere in the house, and this seemed like the perfect opportunity!  So we added a chair rail and did white above it, and black below.  I figured some art in black frames could balance it out.

So here is the 'after' in its current state:

I need to hang a couple more things on the white walls, and we still need a toilet paper holder and towel bar.  So yeah, not totally finished, but decisions (and action) take time in our house.

I got about fifty of these 'botanical prints' for $20 from Modcloth.com.  No idea where I will put them all, but this one will get hung up above the toilet at some point.

Details 

Paint : Tricorn by Sherwin Williams 

Sink : Kohler - came with the house

copper faucet : Signature Hardware

tile : Lowe's 

light fixture : Lowe's

floral framed art on wall : Lowe's (riiiight? I've never bought any art there, but this one was so vibrant it called to me.  and only $19!)

mirror : IKEA - already had...looking for a bigger one.

All the labor in this room (electric and plumbing included) was done by Hubby.

Nice job, baby!

Any transformations happening (slowly) in your home?  Are you a "get it done quickly" kind of renovator, or are you slooooow movers like us?  

amsterdam

Despite the history and literary lustre of London, Amsterdam was the highlight of this trip for me. Perhaps it was because I got to adventure a little bit on my own during this portion of our vacation, while Paul attending a two day conference (the entire reason for our trip in the first place.)  Our hotel was quite a distance from the city of Amsterdam, in Noordwijk, a beach town on the coast.  Therefore I had to take the city bus to Leiden, a larger city, and then take the train to Amsterdam.  I don't mean to sound like a diva, but I personally have never had to take a city bus by myself.  Anywhere.  Much less in an unfamiliar European country.  Other big cities I've visited I've been with someone who knew the ropes and was with me.  I've never lived in a city where it was the norm to commute that way, and have always had a vehicle to get places.  So this was all new to me!  A bit scary - and awesome.

So both days that I had to myself went a little like this.  Get up slowly (a luxury I rarely never get) then head to the hotel gym for a workout, shower and get ready in a leisurely fashion, then muster up the courage to go out into the unknown - on my own.  Obviously, the first day was the most daunting.  You should have seen me trying to look like a local at the bus stop.  Inwardly I was geeking over the whole concept.  "I don't have to deal with traffic!  I can read my book while I get where I am going!  I can enjoy the scenery!  Look!  They have cool screens to tell me exactly when the bus will get here!"  Yes, ridiculous, but I was really pumped.  Then I got on the bus and almost shouted to the driver with joy, "I need a ticket to Leiden Centraal!" He humored me by not outwardly rolling his eyes, and helping me find the correct amount of Euros in my palm.

My first bus experience was good - meaning uneventful.  Got to Leiden and went to a coffee shop for sustenance, since I had been too nervous to eat any breakfast.  Then it was off to buy my train ticket, and after determining I was not tech savvy enough to work the electronic ticket kiosk (actually, a helpful local told me I'd be better off finding the info booth and buying it there - doh) I got the ticket and headed to my platform.  To make sure it was perfectly obvious I was a tourist I took a "train station selfie" :

adventuring solo - train platform selfie with coffee

When I arrived at Amsterdam central station and headed out of the train station it was love at first sight.  I don't know exactly what it was, but I think there are some places you just know you are going to have a connection with.  The bicycles (I don't ride a bike) and the fragrant aroma of marijuana (I've never smoked it) overtook me in quite a positive way.  Kind of made me want a cute old bicycle to ride around on and partake in some weed!

I did neither 'quintessential Amsterdam' activity, but enjoyed walking all around the city all the same.  I stopped and shopped wherever I wanted to.  Spent an hour in a bookstore.  Walked through the Tulip Museum.  Walked past the two-hour long line at the Anne Frank house and decided to pass on that.  Enjoyed the artsy vibe on Spui Straat.

I found this city so interesting.  Chic, a bit gothic, edgy, pretty, clean, fun! 

just one of the many shopping areas - teeming with tourists and 'coffee shops' - which I learned means 'places to smoke weed' 

a massive array of bicycles greets you outside the train station

  Love the buildings here!  

pretty canals.

geeked over all the brick herringbone streets. 

old gothic church.

I didn't really care to do my hair that day, so...hello forehead!  

The second day on my own went pretty much like the first.  Except after getting ready I walked down by the sea for a while, despite the wind and the drizzle.  None of my crazy selfies turned out, as trying to hold an umbrella in the wind while taking a selfie is a recipe for disaster, but I love the shots I got of the other brave souls on the beach, dogs and a their people.

our hotel by the sea, where hubby's training was held. so imposing in this shot!

I went walking by the "Zuider Zee" as one of our children's books refers to it.  I wasn't the only one!  Dogs and other folks with umbrellas.

yes, I obviously filtered these.  but the pinkish glow captures the feel of the morning.

After walking along the shore a bit and collecting some shells for the kiddos, I headed to the bus stop for day two of Amsterdam adventuring.  Somehow I managed to miss my bus, so I ran to the next one and actually stood in the correct place.  This started off a much less smooth day of public transit - I missed my bus, took the wrong train once, sat in first class accidentally and got booted back to second, etc, etc.  Literally, I made any mistake that can be made, but only because I felt more comfortable and spent more of my time reading my book than paying attention.  So since I had no real agenda and had already walked Amsterdam I wasn't too stressed!  

That night at dinner, when Hubby was finally done with his conference, we went to a little Mexican by the beach and recapped our very different experiences over beer and margaritas.  We ate inside, away from the cold and drizzle, with the heaters...but it sorta gave us a reminder of Mexico!

Morning had us packed up sharing a car into the city with one of Hubby's co-horts at the conference.  After two days on the bus, I have to say that a car suddenly seemed like a luxury.  We enjoyed the first sunny day we had on our trip, whirling past tulip fields and windmills.

After dropping off our bags at our hotel near the airport, we rode the train to Amsterdam and got to have a full day together seeing everything...which, independent as I am, is just more fun.  We didn't really "do" much, just walked around, stopped for beers when thirsty at cafes by the canals, soaking in the sunshine, fresh air, and vibe of the city.  

I decided to go with an "authentic Dutch lunch" - ummmm...whatever this was, it was not my favorite.  Inside this fried thing was what I can only describe as "weird pudding with meat chunks in it."  This trip was not a "foodie dream" but at least we drank plenty of delicious beer. :)

the goat cheese salad was good, though!

adventuring solo was exciting, but adventuring with hubby is most fun of all.

The highlight of that day, and perhaps the whole trip, was walking through the Van Gogh Museum.  I am one of those people who could not paint a decent painting to save my life, but have always loved art.  Like so many, I've felt a deep connection with van Gogh's iconic paintings and bold, unique brushstroke style since taking art history, art writing and various other humanities courses in college, and having prints of his famous images all over my apartments during my single days.  I have connected with his work in that his story involves his struggle with depression, which I can intimately relate to, and find so beautifully and hauntingly captured in his work.

Seeing his masterpiece 'Sunflowers' up close and personal was beyond moving.  Obviously I highly recommend going through this museum if ever in Amsterdam!

Anyway, we bought some (cheap) art in the museum district to remember the day by, and then, feet aching, headed to find a cafe for dinner.  It just so happened my dinner came with potatoes, which I found really nerdy-cool after viewing van Gogh's collection.  Also ironic because we are pretty much the opposite of "the potato eaters."

Early the next morning we headed home to the US, to our babies, and some warmth and sunshine...all of which I couldn't help feeling deeply grateful for.

+ + + + + + + 

Soooo...have you been one place this year that you've never been before?   Where would you go if you could choose any one place in the world to take a trip?